Contemplating

last years pics

love the blues

love my crocks!!

It's 3:00 am and here I sit wide awake. Maybe I had too much caffeine.or maybe my mind just can't stop contemplating. Thinking of the year gone by and all that we have been through and how God, in his infinite wisdom, worked out every single detail of our lives/ I try and never look back. Only forawrd. I realize as I approach the aging process, being a baby boomer. I do not feel a bit older and certainly don't act it. LOL!! I do however feel it at times. I brewed a pot of hot coffee to clear my mind of fog yet sleep somehow eludes me. I look around and think howin the morning:) I will chnage things. Right now I took my pain medicine to help the pain I am in and feel a bit groggy. I have sold things I swore I never would and have not missed a single thing. I have lost friends that I thought were friends that misread my writings and took it their own way. All I can say is it is their loss. I am a grown woman and will not succumb to such nonsence. I had enough of that in school and I certainly will not tolerate it as an adult. I speak my mind. Plain and simple. So as I sit here contemplating another cup of coffee or going back to bed I just feel melancholy. These are powerful drugs. It clogs your mind at times and I am not so sure that is a good thing. I do knowthat it helps the elusive pain I am in every day. Lupus Sucks!!It really does/ I could write a book of the pain and suffering of SLE!!BUT, instead I will write of the blessings it has brought me and how God has used this as a witnessing tool in my life. I may not exactly like it but I am privy to it. So let's make the most of what we are given. NOW, Contemplating on going back to bed.

Candilou